Just to keep my friends on their toes. you didn’t think I’d post a Jamexican picture today did you? This picture is hilarious- I love the various slightly sauced, kitchen facial expressions.

I was inspired to post it because I was playing a flickr alphabet game and needed a J. I thought of Joy so entered her in as the representative of J in the third game. I hope she doesn’t mind but I love that picture and jumped at the chance to use it. My other contribution was G is for Grass- Pampas Grass. Nice.

I may have to do my own A-Z Mosiac with pictures of my friends. Fear me and my camera. Mwahahahaha. Actually, no. I can’t do that- they have pictures of me too. Shudder. Just an A-Z Mosiac of my photos will do. Stay tuned.

I know, I’ve been slacking. Sorry but things have been a bit busy around here. Field trips, IFSP – (Individual Family Service Plan) Meetings for the triplets’ state funded therapy (speech, occupational, physical, developmental), Travel plans for my sister’s wedding in August (Hi! I’m traveling thousands of miles with three almost 2 year olds! One with extensive medical needs! Did you know you can’t take regular oxygen tanks on airplanes? You do now!), Counseling to figure out what the hell is up with me, my husband, this marriage, etc, etc, etc. (we’re still separated but mostly amicable. sometimes.), oh and that whole I have to have my foot cut open again next Monday.

Now that was one hell of a gramatically, punctionationally and every other way incorrectly structured paragraph. If only I had an English Degree. Oh wait! I do!

Next week, I’m having surgery on my damned foot again. I will be in the hospital overnight and then moving to my parents’ house with the kids for at least a week. I’m not allowed to get out of bed except to go to the bathroom for a week. I am only supposed to need crutches for a week and then I’ll get some shoe/boot thing. Oh! And I get an external rail anchored with screws to the side of my foot for 6-8 weeks to stabilize my foot without a cast. Awesome! I’ll have hardware attached to my foot on the outside and inside! Can’t wait!

So, that’s the poorly written reason I’ve been too busy to write but not too busy to read every celebrity gossip site known to man. Oh, and this crazy bitch’s page that has it out for one of my friends. Long story short- psycho is with my friend’s ex-husband which gives her delusions of unmerited grandeur. She has caused numerous problems in the past and has now resorted to the construction of fabulous lies about her life and posting them online because she thinks my friend reads it (she doesn’t but I report back). She is also fond of talking shit and threatening physical violence against her while mocking her for being pregnant by saying she’s going to be fat and miserable, yet she says she’s the good person and my friend is evil. Yeaaaaah. The best part is when she posts pictures of herself next to graves* and with Ouija Boards (so Witchboard! So Emo!). She fancies herself a photographer. It would be hilarious if it wasn’t so pathetic. So, even though I’ve been really busy, I find myself drawn to psycho’s page because her idiocy is truly unbelievable. I should name her right here and give you her address but sigh- that would just be sinking to her subterranean level. Plus, I don’t need her stalking me. Why is it that the most disgusting people in the world always think they are the shit? Why do the truly stupid splay their dumb ass selves all over the web like roadkill? And why the motherfuck do I read it?

*I photographed some graves in a cemetary the other day but I wasn’t trying to be deep. It was an interesting site and I wanted to submit the pictures to an area historic society. My Dad was walking his dog in the freshly plowed field behind his house when he found an old (1800′s), tiny, family cemetary literally in the middle of the field. There are tree stumps next to crumbled tombstones and a patch of lillies near the graves so at one time it was well tended but no one seems to care for it anymore. It was a very odd, sad and interesting sight.

Just got done watching my TIVO’d 2 hour American Idol Gives Back episode. I have never been so grateful for DVR in my life- thank you sweet Jesus for letting me fast forward through all the commercials. (Note- if you haven’t watched it and want to, don’t read on since i’m going to reveal the spoiler)

- The Celine Dion/Elvis “Duet”? STUPID. I don’t like Celine Dion to begin with and watching her perform with a holographic, eerily glowing projected Elvis? Honestly, I didn’t watch it because I was too busy rolling my eyes and fast forwarding.

- I am not a fan of most country music and don’t particularly care for Carrie Underwood (though I did vote for her last year because I thought she deserved it and she is hella cute), I found her segment singing to African children to be the most poignant. She made me cry.

- Call me naive but I didn’t realize how many African children still die of Malaria. It is such a preventable, cureable disease and I feel like a spoiled American just watching the conditions those kids were living in. The next time I complain about waiting too long in the ER? I am going to hit myself.

- There is no excuse for the city of New Orleans being such a wreck two years after Katrina. It is an embarassment to the United States that this situation hasn’t been remedied.

- The American Idol Producers were mean, mean, mean for making Jordin think she was getting voted off. They made her cry! They suck! She is only 17 and can sing circles around 99% of the world. She should win because, not only does she have a great voice, she has a huge presence. Melinda and LaKisha are very good singers but Jordin has a lively, fun personality and should win.

- I have no money to spare and no credit card to bill it on but want to donate to the causes I saw tonight. However, I’m not donating to American Idol- I’ll donate to one.org. I challenge my friends who give lots of money to animal rescue organizations to donate a little to humans as well.

Damn, these kids are cute. Here they are watching Sesame Street. Again. I walk around singing “It’s a party line, party line, party line” and other completely moronic yet catchy Sesame Street songs all day long.

Happy Earth Day! We celebrated by being a part of Operation Stream Team with friends. There were many shopping carts and various debris pulled out of the creek including a DVD Player, microwave, a washing machine agitator, a knife (no visible blood) and lots of beer cans. We worked on part of a river in an urban area so we didn’t find the usual fishing gear and float trip beer cans, no we found urban beer cans and retail fall out from nearby stores. It was a great day to be outside and I think the river critters will be thankful for a cleaner area.

If you live in Missouri, contact the Department of Conservation if you want to head up or join a team. If you live elsewhere, why don’t you see if your area has a program like this? It is fun and will make you feel like you are making a difference.

I have been having very odd, vibrant, memorable dreams. Iknow, I know, reading about someone else’s dreams can be dull but I will ‘splain. No, there is not enough time, I will sum up.

• I am in a fashion show! I don’t know how to walk and feel awkward. Suddenly, everyone must evacuate because of biological warfare. Crusaders from the future innoculate us against the virus (12 monkeys?) but if anyone who hasn’t had the vaccine touches us, there is a giant surge of static electricity and we’re vulnerable to the deathly virus again.

• Camel begins giving away money like the lottery and Camel Cash is the lottery ticket. I win $250 after picking someone’s Camel Cash off the ground at the bar.

• I’m sitting in a jet with a few travelers but no pilot. The plane gets knocked into neutral and somehow plows into a cemetary, resulting in a Poltergeist- like excavation of rotting bodies and deathly goo leaking into the plane. I fear swallowing flying ooze.

• My friends are in the backyard playing tennis even though we don’t have a tennis court. One male friend is crying because his finace has left him for cheating on her with a girl everyone says I should know but I have no idea who she is.

• I’m at McDonalds and don’t have enough money for my $30 order so the drive through worker asks me if I want “an employee override” to make it $14