in the past seven days, i attended four separate parent-teacher conferences and four “fall” (because we can’t call it halloween even if we’re wrapping the kids in toilet paper to look like mummies and decorating pumpkins while listening to thriller) classroom parties. i went to eight different classroom events, hoisted myself out of at least ten knee destroyingly tiny chairs, burnt my fingers with a hot glue gun 3 times, stole halloween candy from my kids’ bags and plied 10 yr olds with mountain dew. this shit is not for the weak. or easily bored.

two of the triplets are about to get “reconvened” on their individualized education plans because they’ve hit all of their goals and have been judged academically ready for kindergarten two years before they start. they are keeping jack and lily in the district funded preschool for two days a week and for now, ethan will still be going four days a week (3 hours per day). the brief window i had without the kids in the house is going to be disappearing. the perks we were given by the government and the school system for having the triplets too early and too sick are all being taken away. i am incredibly grateful and thankful the kids are healthier and more developmentally appropriate so they/we don’t need as much assistance. i am also a bit freaked out at the change and unsure about what comes next and how it will all work out.

the kids don’t get easier as they get older. every hour is a new adventure with new challenges or discoveries. one minute, they are running around squealing and giggling but the next, they are screaming and fighting. they eat constantly, are highly emotional, make giant messes, ask for something the second my ass hits a horizontal surface, want to type on my computer, ask for every new toy they see for christmas (already) and jump on me while i’m asleep. they are the most exhaustingly cute small people i know.

halloween will be a hoot. i’ll force myself to post pictures on november first because i may just be crazy enough to write every day during the month of november for nablopomo. it is a level of commitment that i’m questioning but MAYBE! speaking of halloween, go check out one of my favorite blogs and admire their kids’ awesome pegasus and griffin costumes. 

my kids’ costumes are 1) hand me downs from the oldest 2) bought on 90% clearance last year after Halloween at Target (when I see the 90% off sign at Target, I get weepy from happiness) 3) cobbled together

trick or treat, bitches.

i am really good at procrastinating. i’ll perform the most menial task that i normally hate to avoid doing something else i don’t want to do and end up beating myself up for not doing what i was supposed to for longer than it would have taken to do that thing in the first place. it is a vicious cycle.

when i was in school, i would wait until the last night to write the paper, study for the test or prepare the presentation. when i worked in an office, i couldn’t start the project until i knew i couldn’t push it off any longer.  i miss being paid for sitting at a desk and procrastinating while sipping free coffee, raiding the free medicine cabinet, stealing free bagels from the executive break room and surfing the internet.  why did i hate cubicle life again?

i can’t imagine the self discipline a full time writer must have that makes him or her push to write the next page without anyone pressing a deadline (unless said writer is successful and has an editor/publisher doing those reminder calls). i seem to need deadlines so i can push up against them, fill myself full of anxiety over potential failure, suffer through a few missed deadline nightmares and finally culminate in a frenzy of freaked out inspiration. maybe i just work better under pressure but it isn’t just laziness because procrastination takes a lot of work.

i try to write or rather, i tell myself i’m going to write, but any excuse stands in my way. here are some of my recent excuses for not writing:

-it was raining

- cramps

- new gym membership! something else to procrastinate, hate myself for not doing then finally do! but i did go and hope to go again.

- sick kids

- stupid computer

- need to catch up on DVR’d Glee and Mad Men

- hollywood gossip sites

- needed a shower

- the dog was staring at me and making me feel guilty for not taking her for a walk so i took her for a walk

- my foot hurt

-  general malaise and melancholy that comes with a new autumn

- my babies are getting older! must obsess over aging and mortality.

- really needed to go to the store to buy magic erasers (since ethan wrote all over the damned walls. again.)

- contemplation over why ethan keeps writing on the walls

- kids keep sneezing, coughing and there’s the swine flu. research swine flu for 5 hours on the internet.

- take a triplet to the pediatrician so he could stick a long q-tip up my baby’s precious little nose and find out he didn’t have swine flu.

- sudden need to disinfect the entire house

- that laundry isn’t going to put itself away and no one else but me will either (but when they run out of socks, they will understand my power)

- lily wants to watch you tube again

- oh, i suppose i should feed these small people that live in my house

- NAP*

- pay bills

- make a detailed flow chart of bills and swear to lower bills

- time to watch more battlestar glactica DVD’s with the husband

- facebook stalking and/or mocking

- posting pictures to flickr

- helping the kid with his homework**

- thinking about what i should write that i’ve never written

There are my reasons for not doing what part of my brain wants me to do and part of it does not want me to do. It is all very complicated.  I’m sure procrastination has its good points but I’m still trying to figure out what those are. Do you procrastinate? If not, how do you not do this?

* Is it sad that napping is often my most favorite activity in the world? Because it is. I don’t nap everyday and find myself a bit mournful on a days when I cannot nap.

** Oldest child is in fourth grade. He is smarter than me and does all “challenge” work. This week, one of his spelling words was impetuous. A word that I just spelled wrong and corrected thanks to the red squiggly line that popped up as I misspelled it. Now, I made it to the spelling bee and got A’s in spelling but I’m pretty sure impetuous was not one of my fourth grade spelling words.